Self Forgiveness - Overview

I will be going through a series of self forgiveness.

​Our past can sometimes weigh very heavily on us. There is no way to travel back in time to undo things we have done in the past, though many of us wish we could.
 
Even the great apostle Paul looked at his past with great regret, “For I am the least of the apostles, who am not worthy to be called an apostle, because I persecuted the church of God” (1 Corinthians 15:9).
Paul wrote these words about 20 years after his persecution of the early Christians, and they indicate that he had by no means forgotten his shameful and destructive actions as a young man. 
 
The Bible record shows us that Paul left that life behind and went on to lead a much more constructive and productive life. And, as we will see, he had much to say about forgiveness and not remaining stuck in feelings of guilt.
 
What can we do when guilt and regret about our past actions keep us from moving on with our lives as we should? How can we learn to leave those things behind and move forward? The Bible doesn’t speak in terms of forgiving ourselves, but it does give a blueprint to follow in freeing ourselves of past guilt and regaining mental health.
 
We can start by realizing that forgiving, whether it involves forgiving others or forgiving ourselves, is not about condoning wrong actions. It is not about a lack of accountability. It involves understanding that God forgives sinners who turn from their sins and turn to Him, and that God then allows and wants them to move forward.
 
Let’s look at seven questions to ask yourself when you struggle with self-condemnation.
1. Why should I continue to condemn myself when the Lord no longer condemns me?
2. Is my self-condemnation drawing me into a closer relationship with God, or is it driving me further from Him?
3. What good am I doing by refusing to forgive myself?
4. Does self-condemnation help or hurt my relationships with others?
5. Does my refusal to forgive myself impress God? Does He find me more devout because of my guilt and shame?
6. Is there any biblical basis for withholding self-forgiveness?
7. How long do I intend to condemn myself? What will be the end result?

Normally, the answers to these questions are obvious. However, if you’re in the throes of self-condemnation, the truth may seem hazy.

Often the only way to work through times of self-doubt and remorse is to focus on the basics of who God is and what He wants for your life. If you are struggling with an inability to forgive yourself, prayerfully consider the seven questions above. Read them aloud, and let them work through your spirit. What helps me is, journaling. I prefer to take some quiet time in the morning to write out my thoughts. If you don’t have a journal, don’t let that stop you from putting your thoughts out there. Take out a sheet of paper to record your thoughts or put them in the notes on your phone as the Lord speaks to you. Don’t be surprised by some intense wrestling in your heart as you consider these points—and as God reorders your thoughts about yourself.
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If you are having a tough time answering these seven questions, set aside time to really think through them. I will be breaking down each question over the next few weeks and share my thoughts and experiences from walking through this process of self-forgiveness.